I am falling for Fall...

The air isn't quite crisp enough for me...not just yet anyway.  But every which way I turn, I see fall surrounding me with her beauty, her wonderful colors, and her enticing fruits of this season.  It is truly breathtaking and it fills my soul with joy!

I mean who wouldn't want to submerge themselves in the fun of this season.  We have many traditions in my household and I find that it is because of these traditions I am able to keep going.  Able to get up and move on, push myself to do because I know the fun it will be.  Traditions are so important and traditions keep us grounded in life.

I have committed to "live in the moment" and I am striving to do this every single day of my life. But it is when I do our traditions that I am probably the most content, the most happy, and the most joyful in life. True...I love new experiences but traditions are like the warm cup of hot cocoa on a cold night, that warm soft blanket we snuggle in when we aren't feeling quite right, or that soft worn out flannel shirt we wear year after year because it brings us comfort.  Yes, traditions are comfort food for me.  And heck, they don't always have calories either :-)

So off to the pumpkin farm we ventured this day. And what a grand day indeed....

The pumpkin patch is featured yearly at a local church.

And yes, there are pumpkins here, there and everywhere!

But what the heck is this! I was so tempted to bring it home and add some feathers.

There are big pumpkins, medium ones and tiny ones too!

TJ found her perfect pumpkin.

I'd say she is a bit excited with her find!

Just the right size for me and my ra hands.

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet and this spider came to scare her away!

Our happy fall fireplace.

My kitty pumpkin. 

TJ's elegant pumpkin. Ain't it pretty?

I truly hope that this inspires you to grab a loved one or a friend and decorate a pumpkin of your very own.  It is truly a great way to welcome in the fall.

OKzzzz...I'mz takinz youz advice...diz iz definitelyz az differentz purrrrspectivezzz onz lifez!

My daughter and I are walking in the upcoming Arthritis Foundation walk. If you would like to make a donation, I know it would go to a great cause! From the bottom of my heart...thank you.

http://wilmingtonarthritiswalk.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=1014430&supId=365959918

The Rip Tide...

The first call came over two and 1/2 months ago.  He was ill. He had been diagnosed with lung cancer caused from agent orange. My brother was in a fight for his life.

Immediately I left, drove the grueling 10 hour drive to be with him. To do what I could, when I could and as I should.  We all fought together side by side for weeks. It went on for weeks. The around the clock care to do what we could, when we could and as we could.

We didn't win the battle though. It reminds me of a rip tide. You get caught up in it. Your first instinct is to fight against it and fight hard. Of course you believe you will win the battle. But as you fight it you are overwhelmed with the realization that at some point if you don't just let go and drift out, succumb to the realization that you can't beat it, you will drown anyway. That is what the fight reminds me of when one is fighting such a cancer.  And not that I don't want to ever believe that many will win but in his case, the foundation was laid years and years ago and the odds were stacked against us all. Damn Vietnam War! Damn agent orange!

He passed away July 26, 2012.  He was only 64. His favorite motto was "Livin' the Moment".  And so since his death I have been trying to do just that. I have taken back out my bucket list and began to consciously work off that list.  I am trying to Live in The Moment to honor him and his memory. To honor all their memories.

The waves have finally (I hope) washed me roughly back up onto the shore.  It has been a tough rip current ride this past few months. One that I am not sure I can ever (nor maybe should I ever) forget.  And one that will take me a long, long time to unravel and come to grips with.  We loose so much in our lives living with chronic illness and one would think that we would get use to riding out the tough times. But we don't.  We truly don't.

I think these past few years and all my close family members passing has just taken its toll on me. I will try to stay grounded on the beach for awhile and I will try to tend my life but I will always (and I mean always) have my eye on the far horizon…wondering if the rip tide will get me again.

How I try to forget about ra...

I know that we can never really forget about ra because it is there like the very heart that keeps us going. But I do try really hard to forget about my ra.  And one of my favorite places I like to go when I am able is a local hideaway here in my hometown.  I can't help but smile when I am here...

This lovely little gem is our county's arboretum.  Here I am taken away by the beauty of a cultivated haven, kept safe by master gardeners trained at this very spot.

Every season offers a variety of bursting colors, smells, and natural beauty that reminds me of just how blessed I truly am on this earth.

And every corner offers a different garden...should one wish to replicate it in their own backyard. I say...just move me here instead!

In addition to a water garden, a Japanese garden, Children's garden, and ability garden there is a breathtaking rose garden.  But this beauty only blooms once per year.

And even though I come here to get away from it all, I am still reminded of the beast that lurks within.  This serpent has become my mascot of sorts for my personal ra.  He is always hiding but if you look closely you will see him at every turn.

And although there is a lovely paved walkway that weaves in and near each garden, if one is brave you can get off the beaten path if you wish.

This little gem is one of my favorite flowers!  And yes, I do have these in my backyard at home as well.

For me, bridges remind me of my accomplishments.  There is just something comforting and inviting when I see such a beauty.  I can't help but want to crossover it and get to the other side.

And yes, for the weary they have built in many rest stops along the way.

If you are lucky enough to have an arboretum in your neck of the woods, I highly recommend you pack a picnic and head on over.  You may just be surprised at the many wonders that lurk within.  Happy trails!

OKz...letz me getz thiz straightz. Yuz getz toz goez toz thiz loveliez place, whiltz I stays homez in my holez? Ohz heckz noz! Youz willz payz dearlyz tonightz!